It is with great disappointment (and perhaps a tiny bit of relief) that I concede in my bid to get on the ballot for trustee at Penn State. Here is the list of the 86 candidates who made it.
my loyal readers, er, reader, um, as some guy in his mom’s basement looking for another kind of Lion’s Den with porn knows, I threw my hat into the ring to get nominated for the BOT. Alas, you need fifty nominations to get on the ballot, and I probably came up about 49 short.
To those who voted for me, I thank you. Please resume your medication.
I had rather looked forward to someday being a trustee. My platform of stressing football while de-emphasizing Rodney Erickson was unparalleled. I had big dreams. Someday, I would have been Emperor of the Board. Nay, Emperor of the Big Ten! The NCAA! The whole wide, wide world of sports! Total domination.
But now my dreams are crushed. My life sucks.
Then again, who would want to be Emperor?
I’m going to go play Angry Birds now.